the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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