i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
