New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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