his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Sorry about my life...
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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