Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
that may or may not have been my penis.
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