She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
