did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
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