he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Randomize
