I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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