What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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