i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Who died my cat blue again?
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
