If that was your dad, he is hot
I smell stomach acid.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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