Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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