some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
this is a mass text: the cage has been opened. repeat, the cage has been opened. a search party will be organized. you are all sloppy bitches. that is all.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
