Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
