I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
