Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
She swung at the pinata with crutches
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
