If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
