I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Randomize
