so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
