And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
