I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
