Little spoons don't ask big questions
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
