I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize