can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
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