Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Randomize
