just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
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