google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Randomize