it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
