is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I wish a night of watching Dear John and a bottle of wine could cure my herpes.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
