We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
