Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
