She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
