capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Randomize
