they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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