you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
