I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
