I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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