so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
