How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Welp...herpes.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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