even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
