he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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