why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize
