I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
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