Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize