In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize