so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
I told my mom Jesus would want me to snort drugs on his birthday
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