What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
