have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
There r osticjed everywhere
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
Randomize
