I can't watch pbs sober anymore
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Houston, we have a squirter
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize