We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
