just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
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